After the craniotomy, the days seemed to go on forever. We were in ICU going on four weeks, and it was time to think of how we were getting back home. Questions were swirling around in my head. Would we be taken back in an ambulance, train or airline? How many days would it take to get from Virginia to Florida? The opening in Carl’s head had been stitched, but the bone had not been put back, nor was anything placed over his head for protection. What would happen if he bumped this spot when traveling back home? Worries and concerns made me feel like my brain was floating in swampy waters.
Out of nowhere, a nurse advises me that it’s time to go and that a medical jet would be flying us home along with an accompanying nurse. Holy moley was all that I could say. She explained that another representative would come and discuss what we were about to face. It was a bit unsettling, but knowing that hours and hours of driving would be replaced by what, an hour’s flight? I was happy.
My brother-in-law had to get back to his life and oh, how I hated to see him leave. He had been such a great comfort walking through this with me. I don’t know what I would have done without him. To top it off, he had asked his daughter, Alison, to fly in to take his place for the last few days. She came all the way from Texas to lend me a hand, helping me through the next portion of this journey. I was so relieved to know that I wouldn’t be alone just yet. If I could stress that point, just a bit. Walking through traumatic events alone can be absolutely devastating. If you can offer time to help, even when they say they are okay alone, do it! Don’t hesitate. Just go and be there. Sometimes loved ones just need someone to sit in silence with them, or bring them a cup of coffee, sitting with them for lunch, or reading a book or scriptures aloud in a calming manner. Your presence can make such a difference. You’ll be there as their advocate when needed and as a friend for just being there.
Alison was a chip off her daddy’s shoulder. So kind, caring and so smart. When she arrived, she went straight to the hotel to unpack and then met me in the ICU. We determined how at least one of us could be with Carl, so we just split the days in half. She stayed with him for about 4 to 5 hours in the morning, and then we would switch. My time away from him would be spent trying to take naps back at the hotel, sleeping as much as possible which wasn’t easy. I worked on getting papers organized, bills paid and continually making phone calls. My dining was restricted to eating in the hotel restaurant whenever I could keep anything down. Mentally, I thought I was handling everything well, but my body reminded me of the level of stress I had been under.
In the late hours, Alison and I managed to de-stress talking like we were teenagers about life’s issues, which gave us both cause to laugh every now and then. She told me about her Master’s degree in music and that she had become a composer, writing music and sharing some of it with me. It took me back to see her level of intelligence and accomplishments, but I shouldn’t have been surprised. High IQs run in Carl’s family.
She was such a big help in keeping up with what the doctors and nurses said when I wasn’t there. She knew the right questions to ask and sent texts to me and her dad right away whenever anything changed. We got along beautifully, and I was sorry to see her go as the day was approaching that we would be flying out of there.
Time to Fly
It was a couple of days later before another representative walked into the ICU ready to show me everything that would happen. Get this, he told me that we were not responsible for the cost of the flight, that it was 100% covered by insurance. Relief was showing all over my face, but, I’m a cautious woman, so I wanted it in writing. The next day I was handed exactly that, signed, sealed and delivered into my hands. No cost to the patient! As far as I was concerned, we were ready to roll on out of Virginia.
The day came, and we were greeted by some of the most professional, sharp men and women yet. They carefully reviewed Carl’s information, got him wrapped up to provide a comfortable, secure ride in the ambulance and jet. They were methodical in their movements and precise with every single detail. I have to tell you I felt like they were embracing me as well as Carl, making me feel safe like I remember my own father gently holding me when I needed reassurance. Carl was asleep, and I was finally able to relax.
Touchdown in Florida
Hours later we landed in Jacksonville, Florida, about a two-hour drive from our home. Carl was at peace the entire flight, never opening his eyes. Thankfully, all of my fears were for nothing. My only regret was that he wasn’t awake and aware to experience flying in this beautiful aircraft. He knew how to fly and loved learning about planes. He would have bombarded the pilot with all sorts of questions. The thought of it all made me smile.
Arriving at the Jacksonville airport, we saw a van waiting to take us to the rehabilitation center. When we arrived at the facility in the late afternoon, everyone knew we were coming, and a room was ready. Can you imagine what was next? Again, huge piles of paperwork greeted me that I had to read and sign giving them all of his insurance information. I don’t know why this wasn’t completed earlier. It would have saved me time that I could have spent with Carl getting him settled. We were safe and sound so I couldn’t complain.
I finally got into his room and saw a couch that converted into a bed. The simple little addition to the room absolutely brightened my day. I could sleep with Carl, avoiding a hotel stay for the night and having to depend on a taxi for transportation.
The Next Chapter Begins
I opened my travel bag and looked for something to eat. Maybe I had some cookies or pretzels? No such luck. I got into my pajamas and prepared my bed. A pillow and blanket were already there for me to use so hopefully sleep would come. I felt secure being close to my husband and being at a fine facility to watch his restoration happen before my eyes.
All of the beeping machines made sure it was not quiet in that room. I was lying on the couch staring at the ceiling, so exhausted, but no sleep. My mind was racing, realizing I had to face the fact that he may never recover, that I might lose my soulmate of 25 years to this thief they call a stroke. The reality was that life may never, ever be the same. The stroke was severe, but I refused to give into those thoughts and committed to fight for him, doing whatever I could do to get him to the best he could be. He had been such a wonderful husband all these years, so I wasn’t about to give up.
It was 4:30 in the morning and my eyes were burning. Please God give me some relief. I had a very busy day ahead of me, and I needed to be alert and focused for everything. Right at that moment, peace filled my heart and mind and that was the last thought I remember having before I finally fell asleep.